Hard Lessons

This past week has been hard for me.  My son was offered a job in Denver and only had two weeks to get everything together to move.  Even though I am happy that he found this terrific job, the thought of not seeing him everyday saddens me.  I did a lot of crying while helping him pack things up, and at times it was hard to hide my emotions. The two of us worked hard to get everything done, but we both wished we had more hands and another week to accomplish it all.

Thursday night I just couldn’t sleep or stop crying.  I went downstairs and looked in on him sleeping, the last night he would be sleeping here.  Next time he will be a guest.  I cried even more.  Sitting on the couch looking at all the boxes all over,  just made me sob more.

Then it hit me.  It was as if someone kicked me in the ass and said “get over it girl”!

I tried to understand how he must be feeling.  Moving out of his childhood home.  Leaving a job here in Chicago that he was very successful at. Taking a chance at a job in a new field in a different town.  Not knowing where he would be living long term, or if this job opportunity was the right choice.

I stopped crying and realized that my job was over.  I had raised him, I nurtured him, I taught him right from wrong, and now I needed to let him go…..my heart has to release him.

Several times a week he would come over for lunch, eat all the food in the fridge, and watch ESPN.  I loved those visits.  I came to depend on those lunches…….too much.

Today he is settled in Denver.  His beloved girlfriend, Anna is there, and her family has welcomed my son with loving open arms.  I am happy for him.  Even though I miss him already, I am so proud of the Man he has become……how dare I cry for myself?

 I just keep thinking of how much money I will save on my grocery bill!

Just remember Dan (I don’t think he even reads my blogs) this quote from one of our favorite books when you were little.

“I’ll love you forever

I’ll like you always

As long as I’m living

My Baby you’ll be”

*From the book Love You Forever by Robert Munsch.

,l,l,l,l,l,lppo

 

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11 thoughts on “Hard Lessons

  1. A mother’s role is not put in the moving boxes or just caressed with the good memories as we may have thought it would be. It’s just done at a distance. Remember that the bond of love is still strong and still so very vibrant. “Blood of my blood” still flows in their veins. (And tears may flow now and then.)
    You and Joe have done such an outstanding job with our Danny Boy and our Billy Boy, Maureen. As mothers, we’ve raised them only to release them to venture onto new pathways. The trail still leads back to the threshold of our hearts…..and they are more than aware of it. The secret is that it is even a greater sorrow for them.
    With James in Alaska and Joe in Corpus Christi, I know whereof you speak. And Lisa’s distance far surpasses all others…..and love knows no bounds.
    So let the tears flow when they find you, and moreover, let the smiles arrive on your face. A job well done! A job well done!

    • Linny, I’m having one of those days and you just brought tears to my eyes. You express your feelings so beautifully in your writing and it calms me. Thank you my dear Linny. I love you!

  2. I know you did a wonderful job at raising a good man.
    Do not cry for you…well you can miss him some…but you are right, he’s probably filled with so many emotions. and guess who made him the man who can handle them?
    You are a dear!
    always remember the quote…you will never go wrong.

  3. It must be so hard having your son so far away. Thanks to Skype and other such things (facebook, too) you can see and talk until he comes back for a visit.
    Wishing you and your son al the best.

  4. Hugs. As a good friend once told me about raising a child, the days are long but the years are short. You should be so proud that our son has roots and wings 🙂

  5. AWW, Mo. I am getting there. I too, have raised a fine young man who has the confidence and independence to stay at school this summer and work there. I admit I was a little disappointed at first but I truly can’t be. It’s just another step in the process. He will always be your child and he will NEVER, ever, forget his mother. He will always come back to you. But if anyone can relate, Twin, I sure can. Love, Laurie

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