This past week has been hard for me. My son was offered a job in Denver and only had two weeks to get everything together to move. Even though I am happy that he found this terrific job, the thought of not seeing him everyday saddens me. I did a lot of crying while helping him pack things up, and at times it was hard to hide my emotions. The two of us worked hard to get everything done, but we both wished we had more hands and another week to accomplish it all.
Thursday night I just couldn’t sleep or stop crying. I went downstairs and looked in on him sleeping, the last night he would be sleeping here. Next time he will be a guest. I cried even more. Sitting on the couch looking at all the boxes all over, just made me sob more.
Then it hit me. It was as if someone kicked me in the ass and said “get over it girl”!
I tried to understand how he must be feeling. Moving out of his childhood home. Leaving a job here in Chicago that he was very successful at. Taking a chance at a job in a new field in a different town. Not knowing where he would be living long term, or if this job opportunity was the right choice.
I stopped crying and realized that my job was over. I had raised him, I nurtured him, I taught him right from wrong, and now I needed to let him go…..my heart has to release him.
Several times a week he would come over for lunch, eat all the food in the fridge, and watch ESPN. I loved those visits. I came to depend on those lunches…….too much.
Today he is settled in Denver. His beloved girlfriend, Anna is there, and her family has welcomed my son with loving open arms. I am happy for him. Even though I miss him already, I am so proud of the Man he has become……how dare I cry for myself?
I just keep thinking of how much money I will save on my grocery bill!
Just remember Dan (I don’t think he even reads my blogs) this quote from one of our favorite books when you were little.
“I’ll love you forever
I’ll like you always
As long as I’m living
My Baby you’ll be”
*From the book Love You Forever by Robert Munsch.